Late Notice

But I'm headed to Nicaragua.  Again.  On Saturday.

So many things I mean tot say, write, share, and never do.  Forget, when I get to the computer, or don't feel like explaining, or don't want to feel like proving myself.  All fear based (or just forgetfulness), so not good, and not based in love.  So, I will tell you now.  I'm going to Nicaragua.  And I'll give you a few highlights in that decision.

A big reason I want to go back is to see a boy I met last time.  Stole my heart, and my ability to avoid cliches.  Nothing I can do about it.  God loves him, and he showed me very clearly.  So, I want to see him again.

Another, is the sheer experience and practice for real life that a mission opportunity provides.  The experience of being in a group of people all dedicated to listening to the Spirit and following as He leads is incredibly constructive and encouraging, formative as we return.  I want to go to rekindle the fires a bit (or to provide space for the Lord to do so), and to be pushed out of what I know.

Things I'm anxious or concerned about:
1-American arrogance, in assuming we have all the answers, and that we figured them out.  Each party involved in missions has something to teach the other, but above all is the awareness that the Lord desires to speak to both those there and those coming.  We do not come to spread our thinking, but to share a relationship and a love, and to serve in the process.  Does that involve teaching, and theology, and ideology?  Yes.  Can we submit our words to the Lord and seek to let His words flow?  Yes.  We can circumvent much of our cultural imperialism/pride through submitting to a higher culture, a greater love- the kingdom of God.  In this kingdom, we are all equals, and all have something to offer each other.  The missionaries, the receiving church, the neighborhoods.  All are made by God, all desired by God, all used by God.

2-Loudspeaker evangelism.  In vogue in Nica.  I don't like it, still.  Very information centered; hard to shout a relationship.  And, my critiquing their methods can easily fall back into number 1^.

3-Leading worship.  I always get nervous.

4-Questioning my reasons for going, and analyzing (deconstructing, unhealthily) my purpose there.

5-The meeting with gangs on the itinerary.  For real.

6-I didn't ask for help (support), and so I fear I robbed the community of sending me and the Lord of an opportunity to bless me and those around me.

7-The fact I haven't told many folks that I'm going.

Well, I can scratch the 7th off the list now.  That's good.

The rest, I need your prayer for.  I'm learning, stretching, growing.  I need the support of my friends, particularly those who love God for who He is and what He's done, and who are walking with me in submitting everything to Him.  We're in this together.

Look forward to sharing stories upon my return.

Also, Hannah (my sister) is coming too.  And so I'm PUMPED.