Prayer, about Friendship and Other Things

From my journal, 1/7/2013

Lord, greatest friend,
You know brokeness so deeply, so purely.  You are holy, and righteous, and broken, and near.  You are closer than a brother.  How should I view friendships?  I think of those I value highly, for faith and brokenness and submission.  Humility.

Their qualities?
-Submissive.  They are surrendered to the Lord to the point of suffering.
-Idealist.  They desire the best, not to get by, and so are sad.
-Steady.  They rely on a higher power, a greater truth.
-Humble.  They listen, know they have no monopoly.  Slow to speak.
-Lover of Beauty.  Music.  Silence.
-Repentant.  They live with one foot trailing behind, ready to repent or bow.

They have ground plowed and ready for Your rains, and for crops of joy.  It doesn't even have to be present yet- but I know it can come.

Basically, the fruit of the Spirit.  The very things I admire are those which You create.  I am drawn to worship by friends like these.  They are those before whom I stand unworthy and wondrously grateful.  You have placed eternity in their hearts, and let me perceive it, even begin to plumb it, though I will never reach its bottom.  Bless them with joy, joy that is deeply flowing from Your pure well.

They are those who are most out of Your way, through whom Your Spirit is most free to flow, and in whom You are most free to dwell.

Help me to love and guard them.

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That You would wash my feet, Lord.  Jesus, it makes me uncomfortable.  I squirm, that God and King would stoop so low.  You will see so much.  I have much caked to my feet, beneath my nails, hiding below.  I have much to be embarrassed by, much to be ashamed by.

Yet You have washed me, Lord, and only my feet are now dirty.  You have made me clean.  Pure.  How good You are.  How loving, sufficient;  how holy, redeeming.  Your love.  Praise God.  I humbly watch, weep, worship as You wash my feet, robed in humility and cloth once again.

Financial Stability.  Lord, You are Lord.  I trust You with my money.  I does not seem likely that I will be sufficient, in any path You lead me down, to provide for a family, a wife, children.  Yet, I desire them, and trust You.  Lead me to the rock that is higher than I.

Lead me to Your will, in marriage and career.  I will go anywhere, do anything, if You lead and if it will draw me nearer to You.  I love You Lord.

My lifegroup, Father.  Guide us, guard us, equip us.  I wait on You.  Speak to us.